9 Lessons That Every Girl In Her 20s Should Learn

So after nearly a year of graduating from university and entering the adult world, I feel like this stage has been a massive learning curve. Sorry to be cliché but my 20s have been like a roller coaster (and I'm only 22 now ha) and I can confirm that the quarter life crisis does exist! I feel like no one ever really explained how much of a huge adjustment this stage is. This has left many of us thinking ‘why has everyone else got their shit together except me?’ When in reality, from speaking to my close friends, we are all experiencing the same fears and anxieties about our 20s. There is a sense of comfort in knowing this, so I thought I’d make a list of lessons that us girls need to practice in our 20s!

1) Scrolling through Facebook, Twitter, Instagram constantly every day will make you feel rubbish. People obviously portray the best version of themselves online and it’s not healthy to read constant updates like ‘Omg just got my dream job, love my life!’, ‘Moving to London with my BFFs’ or ‘Starting my journey around the world, see ya in 6 months’ – DON’T TORTURE YOURSELF. Also you don’t want to become jealous – that’s not an attractive quality nor a trait of a successful person. No one is going to post that they had to move back home because they couldn't pay their rent. People have the same worries as you and things aren't always as dandy as they seem. Don’t worry about what other people are doing, focus on what YOU are doing!

2) If you don’t feel confident fake it. This is something I preach but haven’t fully mastered! Just in the last few days I got told in both my annual review at work and in my driving lesson that I need to be more confident and doubt myself less. On both occasions that struck a chord because I was fully aware that this was an issue holding me back. You will never be 100% confident and you can’t always predict what it going to happen, but you can change how you react to obstacles. Don’t react by going home crying and end up in a downward spiral of misery. When one thing goes wrong it’s very easy to focus on all the other negatives in your life. Try to control that. Go and challenge your failures or insecurities and believe in yourself.

3) Writing a list of everything you like about your life will make you feel 100% better and focus your mind. This is a great way to achieve lesson 2. It's so easy to list all of the negatives in your mind, I've sometimes tried to think of the positives and it’s quite difficult. Force yourself to actually jot them down with pen and paper – your list will grow and it will remind you of all the times in the past that you've achieved something great, perhaps something against the odds. It reminds you that you have the capacity to accomplish greatness when you’re in the right frame of mind!

4) Take the time to figure out what you want to be. At university I was dead set on being a surveyor, I was obsessed and after countless applications and months of trying it didn't work. I felt like I’d failed, this was what I wanted to do but it wasn't happening. When I moved back to Essex I frantically applied to do any job and starting working as a Finance Assistant in an advertising agency. I’d occasionally go to surveying interviews until one day I had a massive realisation that I don’t think I would even like that job. No offence but I felt that it was a bit of a snobby industry - would I even like the people I worked with? I started thinking that I’d be suited to something creative, maybe PR or advertising – this had literally been in front of me the entire time! What I'm trying to say here is that you might think one career path is right for you, when it’s not. Use this time as an opportunity to try out different sectors and find your passion! And don’t worry if your passion is something like playing piano that doesn't pay much, if you love what you do and work hard, the money will come!

5) If you don’t have a hobby find one. Apart from making you seem like a super interesting individual, having a hobby is great outlet for you. I set up this blog because my soul was desperate for a creative outlet. I sometimes have an awful day at work, but once I’m at home posting on my blog my mood is totally transformed. If you are ever having a down day, go and play tennis or learn a language, whatever is good for your soul. You’ll stop wallowing in sadness and feel really productive!

6) Stop analysing your horoscopes. This may not apply to you, but a lot of girls I know analyse their horoscope – I in fact used to as well. I spent like a solid month reading my horoscope and analysing it every single day. I took it as gospel. I needed that reassurance that things would be ok and that something amazing would be right around the corner – I noticed I was only reading this when I felt sad or out of control of a situation. Instead, I should have spent that time working on changing my situation, not relying on the words in a cryptic horoscope. If you talk to guys not one of them will say they read horoscopes – probably because we live in a male dominated society where men believe they can do anything whilst women feel less in control of their life events. But you can be in control, so quit reading the damn things!

7) Start saving money. I spent my first few pay cheques mostly in Topshop, Pizza Express, the work bar, and on taxis home from the bar… I hadn't saved a penny and I wanted to enjoy myself which was fun until everyone I knew suddenly jumped on a plane and went travelling. How did they have the money? How can they afford to go travelling? How can they afford that new car? Whilst some have generous rich parents, most people probably knew what they wanted to do and saved for it. They probably weren't going out every week like I was. What’s even worse than not saving is getting into debt – I haven’t ever had an overdraft or credit card, but I have so many friends that have racked up thousands in loans and the only worst thing than having zero in your bank account, is having a minus! Even if you save £100 a month, you’ll feel so much better having something to show for all those hours at work!

8) If you have a dream, write down a plan. Say you want to save up for a deposit for a flat, write down a logical plan for the next year for example. Plan how much you can realistically save each month and how long it will take to save the amount you need. Having a logical plan stops you from getting depressed and saying things like ‘omg I’m never going to be able to move out’ or ‘omg I’m never going to go travelling’ Write those goals down and plan how to attain them!

9) Find inspiration wherever you can. A few months after graduating, my friends Soph, Marie and I were endlessly Whatsapping each other motivational quotes. We’d just find them on Instagram and send them to each other– It was funny because when we were in our bubble at university we’d judge people posting these quotes like ‘lol that’s so cringe no one cares’. Then once we’d been thrown into the lonely adult world of uncertainty we were like 'OMG YOU NEED THESE QUOTES JUST TO GET THROUGH LIFE'. I'm not saying you should spend hours finding these quotes or reading self-help books, but you definitely should put the advice into practice if it does motivate you. I have a postcard in my room which states 'doubt kills more dreams than failure ever will' and I always have that in the back of my mind when I hesitate on an opportunity. The majority of the time you will be your own worse demon.

Let me know if you girls have any other lessons to add! x

Desk Essentials: 8 Beauty Products You Should Keep at Work

It's a sad thought but we spend an awful lot of our time at work. In those 7 hours I'm at the office, literally anything can happen, and when your makeup is smudged or your hair is frizzy from the rain, 7 hours is a LONG time to wait until you can get home and can sort your appearance out. I cannot stress enough that this post is in no way a 'how to look fabulous at work' type post (that desire goes out of the window at 6.30am) instead it's more a guide of how to look presentable in the office, like a serious, respectable adult you know.

I work in an advertising agency so we can wear what we want, which sounds great but it is actually SUCH a struggle omg - it's like at school when non-uniform day was the best frickin' thing ever but if it was everyday would have been horrible. So whilst one can look smart and presentable in jeans and a nice top, that work chic look gets totally ruined when you've had a bad hair day and now look like a tramp. Anyway after a rather lengthy intro which I did not anticipate, here are my 8 essential beauty products to keep in your desk or your work bag or wherever the hell ya like if you hot desk or something!

1. Invisibobble Hair Band

I admit these look a bit weird, and the whole point of this post is to look presentable but these are SO COOL! I'm no expert but SOMEHOW the spiral shape of the Invisibobble prevents you getting a kink in your hair when you tie it up. This is so necessary during the week when no one has the energy to wash their hair every single god damn day, and you're relying on your hair staying perfect for 2 days. Also you don't get that overwhelming pain in your head when you finally untie your ponytail! (What is that?!)

Hair bobbles in general are an absolute must for your desk for when your hair is flicking out at all directions, and you need to tame that mane.

2. Floss

OMG the amount of times I have been walking around the office with food in my teeth after lunch, smiling and chatting to colleagues is just embarrassing. Why are all the good foods herby like lasagna, or seeded like bread? I am not lying when I say I have literally boycotted poppyseeded bread for about 10 years - it is just not worth the embarrassment and the shear pain of trying to unlodge the seeds from my teeth - so so tragic! Floss is the ultimate essential which I keep in my work bag at all times.

Luckily for you, I have suffered these embarrassing moments so you don't have to! The floss I keep in my bag is from Boots it must have only cost £1 and it is such a life saver.

3. Rimmel Lasting Finish 25 Hour Foundation

While liquid foundations can be bad for the skin, this Rimmel Lasting Finish foundation does provide amazing coverage all day. I'm out the house for 12 hours on a normal day and even longer if I stay out for drinks, but I never have to worry about reapplying this stuff! I also have the Rimmel Lasting Finish 25 Hour Powder which is amazing. You can't go wrong with this!

4. Compact Mirror

For sly little check ups at your desk. I mainly use mine for a quick peak of my teeth - damn that leafy, herby seeded goodness!

5. Perfume

This is the most obvious one, but definitely the most important! Now that summer is almost upon us and it's getting pretty hot, you'll want to make sure you're not stinking. I usually keep a small bottle of perfume like this mini Estee Lauder one in my bag, samples are great for this! Alternatively, I often just buy a cheap body spray like Impulse which you won't mind smothering your clothes with throughout the day.

6. Hand Cream

I've already written about how much I love these mini L'Occitane hand creams - so I won't repeat myself! Hand cream is an essential to keep on your desk. You're always being introduced to people at work and handshakes are generally awkward enough without having dry rough hands. There are too many potential handshake faux pas as it is, so it's good to have smooth paws.

7. Lip Balm

I get through this Blistex lip balm really quickly, mainly because it smells a m a z i n g. It's raspberry lemonade flavour and I can confirm that yes, it does also taste like raspberry lemonade.

8. Barry M Clear Nail Polish

A good clear base coat not only makes your nails look presentable, but can be there on guard for any potential ladders in your tights! I've never seen anyone with ripped tights at work before, and I can't help but imagine the judging looks I'll get when that inevitably happens to me one day.

May Favourites

MAC - Eye Brows

Buying anything from MAC is a truly exciting experience, and despite the price tag there is no doubt that it isn’t worth the whole £13.50! I’ve bought this eyebrow pencil a few times now and I only use little strokes to fill in the brows and add colour. THANKFULLY I narrowly avoided that ‘pluck your eyebrows until there’s nothing left’ phase of adolescence and can embrace the big brows a la Cara Delevingne. So despite being the weird Greek with a monobrow when I was 11, it brings me so much joy to finally say WHO IS LAUGHING NOW to those thin eyebrow-ed girls. I’M DIGRESSING SORRY – The darkest shade they do in this is called Stud which is a dark brown shade and you really don't need to use much to see a dramatic difference. Go buy it girls!

Seventeen - Stay Time Concealer

I often question where I would be without concealer. It is my true partner in crime. We fight dark circles together, we tackle spots together and we deceive others through contouring together. What I’m trying to say is if you use concealer as much as I do, you’re hardly likely to buy YSL Touche Eclat every time (I used it once and it lasted me like 5 minutes seriously).

Seventeen from Boots is a great high street brand which is amazing for every day use, especially for your work makeup. It claims to last 18 hours which is absolutely necessary to get through a tough day at work, and then to look fresh for those unplanned work drinks which you are totally unprepared for!

Benefit – They’re Real

I don’t think Benefit have created a mascara that hasn’t been amazing. Like can you name one?? Bad Gal was amazing, but I definitely prefer They’re Real. I love the plastic wands over the natural bristle ones because I find they prevent your lashes sticking together turning into 1 big scary spider eyelash.

I honestly believe that a good mascara like this one is worth the money – you save SO much time. This makes it totally effortless to get your eyelashes looking longer and flawless within seconds.

Rimmel - Rita Ora Nail Polish

Unlike everyone in the rest of Essex I don’t have gel nails or acrylics or whatever the hell people get? No, I am old fashioned or maybe just plain cheap but I paint my own nails. As it’s almost summer, it seems only right to invest in some pretty pastel polishes. People are always complaining that I wear too much black and white and grey, so bright nails are a great way to add a splash of colour! This colour is called Go Wild-er-ness and it is fab-u-lous.